So Darn Fake

I thought it'll be different after the holidays. You know, hopefully they'll ignore me and I can peacefully ignore them. But, no. I do try my best to ignore them, though. They're so despicable. They're indescribable. Do they really think they're on top of the world? Oh, come on.

Ignoring me when the other one is there watching your every move? Then being so darn nice to me when the other one is not there to see what you do? Similar to what Mun Yee is feeling, yeah. That.

But, not that it really bothers me much. Just felt like blogging here because I'm having this guilt of not blogging for so long. Hehe...

I'll just be ignorant to those who piss me off because I know that I'll only hurt myself more than I'm hurting them who piss me off. Yeah. Life rocks. You just don't know it yet. Haha...

When is the North and South pole going to split? Naturally, scientifically, North and South magnets attract but that doesn't apply for the North and South pole. Oh, I know! The North pole just wants to invade the South pole and then they'd split. Right, right?? I hope! I really, really hope! Then again, if the two poles stick together, the rest of the countries wouldn't be able to meet one another. Russia, America, China, Africa, Japan and Europe all pushed together and cramped at the top of the world while North and South pole take the bottom.

Yay. *step* *step* Bet those countries on the top of the world feels damn good.

finally jayne is here.a contradicting entry.muahaha...

sorry u gurls,i finally realised that i have never blogged in our blog.haha.how terrible of me...at last i read through all your previous posts.at times in life,we make mistakes.learn from it,it will make u a much stronger person,able to handle more in life.unfortunately,life is often unfair.thus,we make even more mistakes.but that's life,and we have to deal with it.heartbreaks often happen,but,love must never be rushed.if that person isnt right,the relationship will never work out no matter how hard you try.being single and being in a relationship has its ups and downs.it solely depends on us on whether we want to be happy.our life is our choice,not anyone else's.trust your gut feeling more than anyone else's judgement.im not saying dont trust your friends,pls do especially if you are extremely close to them,but after listening to what your friend's have to say,think of what you really think.be honest with yourself,and then make the decision.if you make the right one,congrats and if you dont,at least you made the decision yourself and not make another person make it for u.ok,basically im crapping,but i just want you gurls to know i feel your pain,your anguish,your disappointments.but remember,life is no bed of roses,for even roses have thorns unless you break them.but that's another story...

hurt.. twice....

never again will i trust him ever... i can't believe it ended again.. and the reason???he might have to study and work soon.. and he'll be that busy that he can't keep me company.. so we should break up.. and the way he tells me??/

comes to pick me up from school.. and then holds my hand n says,
"dahlin, i have something to tell u."
"do u think we should be together?" (bastard.. don't u think u should have asked urself that before u asked for another chance?)
"i just spoke with my manager.. she can talk to the main boss and i might be able to go back sooner than expected!"
"if i do go back,i'll be very busy.. will have no time for u.."
"so how?"
"so how"...
to which i say it is up to him cos it makes no difference to me already...in my heart i know it's not going anywhere.. and it will end.. yet i still waited.. hoping.. maybe i'm silly to hope for something as impossible and miraculous..i have my other options and choices.. i pushed everything away just for him.. again,mind u.. for the second time i allowed myself to be vulnerable... and he chose to break it again..
was it just a game to u? just cos i was the one to say break up the first time?but still even the first time it was because u changed.. cos u "thought" (ya he said he thought) u liked someone else.. right?so u just wanted to be the one to do the dumping this time round?i thought this time u'd be serious.. sure u were.. u were seriously determined to ruin my life once again..
i really had forgotten all about u.. even the occasional bumping into u had no effects whatsoever on me.. then u had to do it again...why? is it fun? do u feel amused? well im not!!i'm using every inch of my will power to not curse u rite now.. every urge not to take my dad's car.. look for my friends to bash u up..but that's no point is it? i'll be stooping to ur level.. as i'd told u in the car.. i really never wish to have to see u again..
so if u read this.. or any of u who noes him... please let him noe i think he's a... and i never ever want to see his face ever again..if u happen to see me walk away.. or let me noe.. so i can go away.. it'll save us both the trouble..honestly i won't be nice.. won't be courteous anymore.. u r really a..... do u noe how much i'd given up for u? how many chances how many outings how many friends.. all lost just because of u.. u should noe rite? last year.. im being a real bitch n bringing this up cos i want the world to noe i regret.. i regret the day i refused to listen to my frens.. those who told me i shud think again when i told them bt u!! i regret those times i had to lose two close close frens.. all for u.. even after we broke up.. u made me lose another fren.. u never seem to stop trying to diminish my friendships, do u?
maybe i made the wrong choice.. maybe i shouldnt have believed all the sweet talk u gave.. wait a minute.. then there are the incidents of u being too busy for me.. honestly i shudnt hv gotten back shud i? cant blame u i was so stupid..i thought u were for real.. but it seems u rnt.. i thought u'd at least try harder but even from the start it seemed to me like i was a part time hobby.. y did i stay? did u think bout tht? thru it all.. i stayed.. thinkin it'll change.. that nothing stays the same forever.. but u still loved me in ur own way.. but it was just a childish,foolish dream..ill always rank lower than ur frens n ur priorities.. u!wont i?
i really hate u for bringing back the pain the hurt the misery.. all over again,... double the pain this time..thanks to the "wonderful" memoried the 1st time i broke up with u!u really noe which buttons to push dont u?
i totally understand aun jie rite now...dun bother to explain dun bother to say anything anymore.. n aun jie my dear u r rite.. dont ever ever.. give ppl like these a chance.. its better than takin a chance and gettin our heart trampled over once more...we will survive wont we??? n be happy doin it too...
i won't die without u.. don't u ever dare look at me with that kind of pretentious worry and concern u expressed just now.. or i mite really hurt u!one way or another...don't tell me u care..don't ask me if i'm ok with that stupid look upon ur face.. n no we can't be friends because unlike my exes.. u are truly an asshole.. u didn't care bout how i'd feel at all did u? all u saw was another opportunity for u to be busy.. i see it now.. u lost a job u got lonely? bored maybe? i can see im an amusement.. a form of entertainment.. well congratulations.. u got ur laugh.. and u have a great future.. i wish ull be happy i really do... i also pray u can sleep peacefully knowing that u tricked me over and over again..and i know ull be in bliss to noe now that u have even lost the little respect i had for u last time we broke up..thank u for hurtin me.. thank u for feeding me transparent lies that i could see thru... thanmk u for holdin my feelings in ur hands and playin with them.. thank u tremendously for all those hugs n kisses while u were secretly laughin at me..
i just want u to noe that i truly truly despise u.. maybe ill learn to forget.. but to forgive??? we'll just have to see wont we? lets hope i get lucky.....thank u for also making this very good day turn into a horible day.. thanks for startin my skul hols with a horrendous break up.. thanks for being a real jerk...

Childish & Immature Bitch

I absolutely do not believe she did that. I do not believe she said that! What was she trying to do or prove? *sigh* Here's the story...

She tried breaking Tracey and I up.

I mean, hello! Tracey and I are inseparable. We're soulmates. Totally can't be broken up. We're practically married! (sorry, Pak How... it's a fact! ^^)

Come on, I went for a movie with Debbie, Pui Yih and Mun Yee and it wasn't even planned. They planned, yes. I invited myself there. There was a little problem at first so I called them up and asked if I could join them. A bit tak malu but they said okay and I went there and met up with them.

I found this out today:

She told Tracey something like this: 'She go out watch movie with them never invite you meh? Huh? Like that you call friend wan meh? Why she like that wan?'

In the first place, Tracey didn't really care. Why is she complaining so much? I'm at fault cause we didn't call her but we had Economics extra class, see. And I skipped, naturally. I told Tracey I went out with them and she didn't say much. Tracey didn't even say something like: 'Oh, like that la... never invite me.'

Nothing.

She's so childish and immature. She thinks she can ruin our friendship? She better think twice about that! Tracey and I have been better friends than she and her so-called best friend have been. Tracey and I have never had an argument before. We always talked about stuff and laughed about stuff. Unlike her? Come on... before they became best friends, she bitched about her best friend so much it was sickening. Planned on ditching her best friend and all. Just because she has no friends anymore? Gosh, grow up and get a life. Are you confused or something? Cause I think you do not know what you want in life.

She even did the same thing to Tracey and Mun Yee. Do you realise? She would tell Tracey all this kind of things? You cannot trust Mun Yee so much. Do you know what I think of that?

BULLSHIT

This is really pissing me off. If you're jealous because we now have a circle of better friends, you're so damn right for feeling like that. You're making us dislike you more. Trying to ruin friendships? Being a stupid batu api?? Oh, come on. Even losers have better things to do!

You know what? You're making yourself suffer. If you didn't start this whole 'You can't trust her' shit, you would have more friends. And if you could just take that bitchy face off and be nice to other people, you would have more friends. And if you could just put your bloody ego down for one stupid second and maybe say 'hi', you would have more friends. For your bloody bitchy face, you bloody attitude and your bloody ego, you lost most of your friends. And you think too much you're jeopardising your own relationshipS.

Harap maaf. Kesulitan amat dikesali.

Due to some unwanted misunderstandings or (maybe) squabblings, we have deleted a post by Pui Yih on the 2nd of August. Those who have read the post are required to be quiet about it (but very good you have read it!) and to those who have not, well... your loss.